Very Superstitious

Many of you, over the course of the past year or so, may have noticed me wearing this....

It has now become a permanent fixture in my wardrobe. I haven't taken it off since November 7, 2009, when my parents came to visit me in Paris. We were meandering around the Eiffel Tower, when a Caribbean man, whose name I cannot remember, came up to me and pulled the whole "Hey, can I show you something..." trick on me, stuck a bunch of yarn in my hand and began crafting me a bracelet. Normally I would have dismissed him and ran away, but mommy and daddy were there and they hadn't learned to be rude like the French yet. Plus, he just happened to be using Rhea County's colors, so I couldn't be too upset.

As he made this bracelet, he told me that it was meant to symbolize "hakuna matata," like from the Lion King. He kept repeating "Hakuna matata, don't worry, be happy" in this funny little voice. He asked my dad if he could marry me, but that's a whole other kettle of fish. When he finished, he said he would take whatever we wanted to pay for it. Dad, silly Stanley, gave him 6 euros (the equivalent of about $10 dollars at the time). I thought it was just a silly little story and forgot about it. But I never took it off.

Then I came home, and things happened, and I realized I was in serious need of some Hakuna matata. And what do you know, but I had an endless supply of it wrapped around my wrist! I guess that strange Caribbean man in Paris knew what he was talking about! So now, I am consciously keeping it on at all times as a reminder that even though I'm unemployed and single, it's okay because these things always have a natural way of working themselves out. Hakuna matata, don't worry, be happy.

Does it actually work? No, not really =)

Phoebe

I want to tell you about Phoebe. She is a stray dog that has found her way to my neighborhood and made her home on my front porch. This actually happens a lot. I think these dogs can feel the animal-friendly vibe emanating from our abode, and normally it bothers us, but not this time. Phoebe has completely captured my heart. This is Phoebe...

I caught her sunning on our welcome mat. Isn't she precious? And she has these bright yellow eyes that look like snake eyes.

Problem: Phoebe is very pregnant. It is for this reason that we have started feeding her. This is my logic: Think about pregnant women. They eat like crazy, always hungry. And they're just having one baby, whereas there's no telling how many old Phoebs is packing in there. Imagine how hungry she must be! So, we feed her, we give her lots of love, and we let her sleep on the love seat on the front porch. She never bothers anyone, not even Baxter (my Yorkie baby). Best dog ever? It's possible.

I'm sure we will have to find another home for her soon (there's no way I'm dropping her off in the middle of nowhere), and it's going to completely break my heart because I am in love with this dog. And it's so cold out tonight. She has to be just freezing, but daddy won't let me put her in the garage.

In slightly cheerier news, mommy found this for me yesterday...

...a heart-shaped leaf on a tree that doesn't bear heart-shaped leaves. It's one of a kind, and I've decided that since God made trees, this is a sign straight from upstairs that I need to stop being so down. I have an insane amount of amazing friends, both here and in Ky, and my parents love me so much that my mommy is giving me heart-shaped leaves and my daddy is letting me feed and love on stray dogs. When put into perspective, I find that life is good.

So Many Snow Whites

Have you ever noticed how Hollywood seems to think that things are better in twos? It seems like every few years, one of the big conglomerates comes up with a great idea for a movie, and then another conglomerate uses the same idea, and suddenly we have rival movies. Classic examples: Deep Impact & Armageddon, Dante's Peak & Volcano, The Illusionist & The Prestige, Antz & A Bug's Life.

Well, hang on to your knickers, because now, Hollywood has decided that America needs not one, not two, but THREE different versions of Snow White, all being released in 2012/2013. This just annoys me! One is plenty, people! Of course, each studio says that their version has that special something to differentiate themselves from the competition. Let's see...

1.) The Brothers Grimm: Snow White - The only casting move thus far on this one is Julia Roberts as the Evil Queen. I'm cool with that decision, although it's hard for me to imagine sweet Julia playing anyone evil. Apparently, the "It" factor in this one is the director. It's the guy who did "The Cell," so I guess he's just supposed to blow our minds with the imagery. Storyline will be the classic though. I like classic.

2.) Snow White and the Huntsman - The big to-do on this one is the casting. Kristen Stewart as Snow White, Viggo Mortensen as the Huntsman, and Charlize Theron as the Evil Queen. If I get to see Viggo looking even remotely like he did in LOTR again (Ranger = Huntsman), I will have no qualms with this choice. Charlize has that glint in her eye that will translate well to wickedness. But Kristen Stewart? Talk about pandering to the Tweens and Generation Y. Kristen is great as Bella because she and Bella have similar personalities anyway, but I don't think her stumbling over every line and exaggerated pauses are going to lend itself well to this role. In my opinion, Emily Browning was a no-brainer for this role. Look at those rosy cheeks!

3.) Snow and the Seven - This one actually has a shot of being different, so I don't mind it so much. This one is set in China (?) and features 7 warriors instead of 7 dwarfs. I have no idea where they're going with that, but Disney's putting it together, and of course, I have complete faith in Disney. The rumor mill said that Natalie Portman would be Snow in this one, but I think that's fallen through now. Shame. I love her.

The funny thing is that I've never even seen the original, animated version of Snow White. I might be the least qualified person on the planet to give an opinion on this, but my suggestion? Throw all these in together! Keep Viggo, keep Julia (sorry Charlize), don't keep Kristen for heavens sakes, throw in some Emily Browning, and drop them all off in China with some dashing Asian warriors. Anyone remember Shang from Mulan?

Now that's a face I wouldn't mind seeing again ;)

I'm baaack!

There was a time, long ago, when Lindsay Lohan was my favorite actress. This was around 4th grade, when The Parent Trap had just come out, and I was completely convinced that there were two little freckle faced redheads running around somewhere.

Then, that adorably talented little girl grew up and turned into a druggie, an alcoholic, a whore, and a thief. I stuck by her at first, blaming the glare of the limelight. But now, after practically years of rehab and narrowly escaping jail time, she goes and steals a $2500 necklace. Now, here's my logic. If I'm Lindsay Lohan, and I'm famous, and I have all that money, and I see a necklace that I like, and it only costs a (relatively) measly $2500, I'll just whip out the plastic and buy the darn thing. Why steal it! I just don't understand! Unless you have a mental problem.....wait, that's it! She must be mentally unstable! Forget jail, forget the Betty Ford clinic, get that girl to the psych ward STAT!

In other news...tonight is the UK v. UT game. This game makes me nervous, because if we (UK) lose, then I will get a lot of heck from them (UT people). This is the problem when you are a Kentucky fan living in Tennessee. I feel pretty good about it though.

Finally, I'm ready for True Blood to come back on (not till June or July). Yes, I know it's a scandalous show, and I probably shouldn't be watching it, but I'm really just in it for this..

Alexander Skarsgard, the best thing that ever came out of Sweden. I don't typically like blondes, but I will make an exception for all 6 foot 4 inches of this Scandinavian deliciousness.

Weekend Thoughts

I'm leaving early tomorrow morning to go to Campbellsville, KY to visit with the grandparents and the aunts, uncles, cousins, etc., many of which have had the stomach flu this week, so I'm praying that I'm in good health when I come back on Sunday because I need to be in ship-shape for the SUPER BOWL!!! I'm pledging my support to the Steelers this year (yes, I know I'm a terrible person for liking them because their star player is a rapist). I'm feeling some heavy opposition on this point. Even the anchors on the local news station have clearly stated that they are Packers fans. Whatever, you won't catch me in one of those goofy Cheesehead hats.

I spent my Friday with the girls, doing very girlish things, like getting manicures. I'm typically not a one to dish out money for someone to paint my nails, but my goodness, it was worth every penny! My hands are now fabulous!

Don't you agree?

Also, I know I said I wasn't going to acknowledge Valentine's Day this year, and as for the day itself, I'm not. However, I'm the biggest romantic sap you've ever seen, so I'm going to take advantage of this one time of year when you're allowed to be unforgivably mushy gushy, and I'm going to reread Outlander by Diana Gabaldon. This book is the single greatest romance novel in existence, and if that type of thing is up your alley, and you haven't read it yet, then shame on you.

Finally, I saw this commercial last night while I was watching American Idol, and it just completely cracked me up. You need to see it. I think it's always best to end the week with a laugh. Enjoy!

Performance Review

We are officially one month into my search for gumption. I'm not where I would have liked to have been at this point. In fact, I may have back-tracked just a teensy weensy bit. But hey, we've got 11 more months to play with. I'm not entirely worried. I found an exciting new job prospect today, and the unspeakable evil has not been present, so I'm calling this day a great success. 

This is the ultimate goal of this project. Someday, I want to be able to take on the world with this frame of mind. I give you, my inspiration, Iris Simpkins...

Bonsoir!

Lusting after Bellarom

I am in a bit of a sticky wicket, as they say across the pond. You see, just like every other woman on the planet, I love chocolate. Particularly dark chocolate. Just a little square with my afternoon cup of coffee is all I need.

Here's the problem: I'm a chocolate snob. This is, of course, a result of living in Europe for an extended period of the time, where they take chocolate much more seriously than we do here. You can taste the love in it. When I lived in Dijon, France, my apartment was in walking distance of this little discount grocery story called Lidl. And Lidl carried their own brand of chocolate, called Bellarom. And Bellarom just happens to be the best chocolate I've ever put in my mouth. I've had some very fine, very expensive gourmet chocolate in my life, but that deluxe bar of Bellarom dark for a euro and a half is ranked number one on my list. I crave this stuff constantly.

Here's another problem: You can't get Bellarom chocolate anywhere but in Lidl stores, and Lidl stores are only in Europe!! I've been looking in every store and on every website imaginable for the past year, and I can't find it anywhere to purchase. I was an idiot and only brought one bar home with me (which my father consumed when I wasn't at home, unaware of the devastation he was causing), so I haven't tasted the heaven that is Bellarom chocolate since December of 2009......I. Am. In. Misery.

This is a call to action. If you are planning a trip to any of the following countries in the near future, please remember me. Please find a Lidl store, and bring me some happiness in a red box.

Austria
Belgium
Croatia
Czech Republic
Cyprus
Denmark
Finland
France
Germany
Greece
Hungary
Ireland
Italy
Luxembourg
Malta
Netherlands
Norway
Poland
Portugal
Romania
Slovakia
Slovenia
Spain
Sweden
Switzerland
United Kingdom